HOW DARE YOU
The Betrayal. Let’s just get that out of the way. It’s what most of us hate. How could they? I loved them! I am such a great mate. So irreplaceable! Yeah, you should feel that way. Especially when you sacrifice and compromise, and do everything you can, plus more than you probably should to make them happy. Betrayal slaughters trust; and we all know that once trust is gone, every other aspect of the relationship starts to feel strained. You can’t say that water is wet without your partner second guessing you and checking to make sure for themselves.
We think of all of the ‘I love yous’, ‘you’re the only one’, ‘I would never do anything to hurt you’, and the countless other sweet nothings and pretty promises that are shattered once infidelity is invited to the party. Mostly, I hate the realization that you’ve been living a lie, and that painful, long fall off of your pedal stool. But let’s move past that.
IT AIN’T TRICKING IF YOU GOT IT. WRONG!
Finances are one of the leading causes of discord in relationships leading to break ups. Unless you are a woman cheating, or you’re picking easy chicks to cheat with, you are spending money. How infuriating to find out that while you’re sticking to the agreed upon budget, your other half is out wining and dining to impress someone into sex. While you stuck to the plan and said ‘no’ to getting your nails done or going to girls night out, here he is tricking. Here is a great idea. How about spending that effort, attention and money on the person you already have! Hmmm, perhaps that will rekindle whatever may be dwindling, causing you to stray from home. Maybe it will create an appreciation that leads to a fulfillment of long suffered desires. Hmmmm, one could only imagine.
I love when guys are always on their phones and it’s always-my homeboy. Right. First of all, guys don’t even like being on the phone that much so you’re definitely not texting your homeboy back and forth for two hours. You will more likely call and have a 30 second conversation going over the game plan and get back to whatever you were doing. Here’s the problem. That time you’re speaking with her, is time you are not speaking with your partner. These are the ‘why did it take you so long to call me back/return my text?’, ‘why did I go straight to voicemail?’ arguments that could have been so easily avoided. I get it. Your partner gets boring. You already had the conversation about why she is on the verge of getting fired or the current drama in her family. But that’s the job you signed up for when you decided to be paired with your mate. Stop giving someone else the time and attention that your mate deserves.
I had a philosophy for if ever I found myself in a position where someone else caught my attention. My primary would never feel it. I would never skip a beat at home. My decision to entertain someone else would never diminish the level of passion or communication with my mate. They wouldn’t deserve to suffer because I’m doing wrong. Anywho.
THE DUMBEST SHIT EVER
How fucking ratchet, selfish and stupid you are when you have unprotected sex outside of your relationship. This blows my mind every freaking time! You are putting your partner in a position to endure two of the most painful, permanent reminders of your indiscretion. A child and/or an STD. Dumbass. You want to frolic in various beds, backseats, couches, hourly rate motels, or wherever you can get it, fine. I ask, why, why, why put someone else at risk of suffering consequences you accepted for yourself? If you are this reckless and indifferent, you need to be single. No one needs to be at the mercy of your poor decision making. Don’t risk my life because you don’t give a damn about yours!
I’m disgusted every time a guy requests to ‘just let him feel it’. I don’t know you and you don’t know me! How little you value yourself to put yourself at risk for a fleeting sensation that may or may not be temporarily satisfying, at best. If you are asking me to ‘trust you’, I can guarantee there are countless others you’ve tried and succeeded with. And while you are asking them to ‘trust you’, you should be considering if you should trust them. If they say yes to you, who else have they said yes to? We share our bodies with far more people than we physically allow between our legs. You have no idea of how many after effects you have exposed yourself to.
Cheating is bad. Monogamy isn’t for everyone. And those of us who are in relationships but can’t stay faithful are selfish. If you are going to need multiple sexual partners, be honest with your mate. Hell, they may be struggling to be faithful too. An open relationship is possible and more people are willing to engage in one than you know. You just won’t find out because people are afraid to broach the subject or be judged by their partner. Make sure that you are in the best relationship type for your needs and ideas. Keep yourself and your partner safe with honesty and safe sexual practices. Shoot, I support annual check-ups even if you think you are in a committed relationship. People are TRIFE.